April 2012 – Atta ur Rahman Chohan

April 30, 2012

Story of a bus driver – A Management Lesson

Posted: 28 Apr 2012 12:46 AM PDT

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops-a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well. At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, “Big John doesn’t need to pay!” and sat down at the back.

Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. Naturally, he didn’t argue with Big John, but he wasn’t happy about it. The next day the same thing happened-Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the one after that and so forth.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff.

By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what’s more, he felt really good about himself. So on the next Monday, when Big John once Again got on the bus and said, “Big John doesn’t pay!,” The driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, “And why not?” With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, “Big John has a bus pass.”

Management Lesson:” Be sure! What is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one?”

M Junaid Tahir

Read my Blog : http://paradigmwisdom.blogspot.com/

Stress Advice: List down all your worries

Posted: 28 Apr 2012 12:33 AM PDT

Make a list of every single worry you have at the moment. You will notice that you don’t have as many worries as you thought. Worrying consumes our thinking and we think our whole life is one big worry. When you get it down on paper it’s extremely surprising that you don’t have as many as you’d thought.

M Junaid Tahir

Read my Blog : http://paradigmwisdom.blogspot.com/

Story of Gold Coins – The 99 Club

Posted: 28 Apr 2012 12:46 AM PDT

Once upon a time, there lived a King who, despite his luxurious lifestyle, was neither happy nor content. One day, he came upon a servant who was singing happily while he worked. This fascinated the King; why was he, the Supreme Ruler of the Kingdom, unhappy and gloomy, while a lowly servant was so joyous. The King asked the servant, ‘Why are you so happy?’ The man replied, ‘Your Majesty, I am nothing but a servant, but my family and I don’t need too much — just a roof over our heads and warm food to fill our tummies.’

The king was not satisfied with that reply. Later in the day, he sought the advice of his most trusted advisor. After hearing the King’s woes and the servant’s story, the advisor said, ‘Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The 99 Club.’ ‘The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?’ the King inquired. The advisor replied, ‘Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is, let’s place 99 Gold coins in a bag and leave it at this servant’s doorstep.’

Next day when the servant saw the bag, he picked it up and took it in. When he opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy… So many gold coins! He began to count them. After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were 99 coins. ‘What could’ve happened to that last gold coin? Surely, no one would leave 99 coins!’ he wondered. He looked everywhere he could, but that final coin was elusive. Finally, exhausted, he decided that he would have to work harder than ever to earn that gold coin and complete his collection. And from that day, the servant’s life was changed. He was overworked, horribly grumpy, and castigated his family for not helping him make that 100th coin. He stopped singing while he worked.

Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled. When he sought his advisor’s help, the advisor said, ‘Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club…’ He continued, ‘The 99 Club is a name given to those people who have enough to be happy but are never contented, because they’re always yearning and striving for that extra one, telling themselves: ‘Let me get that one final thing and then I will be happy for life.’

We can be happy, even with very little in our lives, but the minute we’re given something bigger and better, we want even more! We lose our sleep, our happiness, we hurt the people around us; all these as a price for our growing greed and desires. That’s what joining The 99 Club is all about

By Junaid Ahmed

April 27, 2012

10 commandments for peace of mind

1. Do Not Interfere In Others’ Business Unless Asked.

Most of us create our own problems by interfering too
often in others’ affairs. We do so because somehow we
have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way,
our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not
conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered
to the right direction, our direction. This thinking
denies the existence of individuality and consequently
the existence of God. God has created each one of us
in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act
in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way
they do because God within them prompts them that way.
There is God to look after everything. Why are you
bothered? Mind your own business and you will keep
Your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget.

This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We
often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the
person who insults us or harms us. We nurture
grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep,
development of stomach ulcers, and high blood
pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but
nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly
remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Believe in
the justice of God. Let Him
judge the act of the one who insulted you. Life is too
short to waste in such trifles. Forgive, Forget, and
march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition.

This world is full of selfish people. They seldom
praise anybody without selfish motives. They may
praise you today because you are in power, but no
sooner than you are powerless; they will forget your
achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why
do you wish to kill yourself in striving for their
recognition? Their recognition is not worth the
aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely
and leave the rest to God.

4. Do Not Be Jealous.

We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our
peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your
colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get
promotions; you do not. You started a business several
years ago, but you are not as successful as your
neighbor whose business is only one year old. There
are several examples like these in everyday life.
Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody’s life
is shaped by his or her previous circumstances, which has now become his destiny. If you are destined to be rich,nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be
gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy
will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your
peace of mind.

5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.

If you try to change the environment single-handedly,
the chances are you will fail. Instead, change
yourself to suit your environment. As you do this,
even the environment, which has been unfriendly to
you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and
harmonious.

6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured.

This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an
advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences,
ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond
our control. If we cannot control them or change them,
we must learn to put up with these things. We must
learn to endure them cheerfully thinking, “God wills
it so, so be it.” God’s plan is beyond our
comprehension. Believe in it and you will gain in
terms of patience, inner strength and will power.

7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.

This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often
tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable
of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know
your limitations. Why take on additional loads that
may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind
by expanding your external activities. Reduce your
material engagements and spend time in prayer,
introspection and meditation. This will reduce those
thoughts in your mind that make you restless.
Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.

8. Meditate Regularly.

Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing
thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind.
Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate
earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will
tend to become peaceful during the remaining
twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind will not be
easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit
by gradually increasing the period of daily mediation.
You may think that this will interfere with your daily
work. On the contrary, this will increase your
efficiency and you will be able to produce better
results in less time.

9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.

An empty mind is the devil’s workshop. All evil
actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind
occupied in something positive, something worthwhile.
Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your
interest. You must decide what you value more: money
or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or
Religious work, may not always earn you more money, but
you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement.
Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself
in healthy reading or mental chanting of God’s name.

10. Do Not Regret.

Do not waste time in protracted wondering “Should I or
shouldn’t I?” Days, weeks, months, and years may be
wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never
plan enough because you can never anticipate all
future happenings. Always remember, God has His own
plan, too for you. Value your time and do the things
that need to be done.It does not matter if you fail
the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and
succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will
lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not
brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened
was destined to happen only that way. Take it as the
Will of God. You do not have the power to alter the
course of God’s Will. Why cry over spilt milk?

April 25, 2012

Mother Care

One young man academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.

He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

The director discovered from the CV that the Young Man’s academic achievements were excellent all the way,

from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score good grades.

The director asked, “Did you obtain any scholarships in school?” the Young Man answered “None.”

The director asked, ” Was it your father who paid for your school fees?”

The Young Man answered, “My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.”

The director asked, “Where did your mother work?”

The Young Man answered, “My mother worked as clothes cleaner.”

The director requested the Young Man to show his hands. The Young Man showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.

The director asked, ” Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?”

The Young Man answered, “Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.”

The director said, “I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother’s hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.”

The Young Man felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid.

The Young Man cleaned his mother’s hands slowly.

His tear fell as he did that.

It was the first time he noticed that his mother’s hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the Young Man realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother’s hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.

After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the Young Man quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.

That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the Young Man went to the director’s office.

The Director noticed the tears in the Young Man’s eyes, asked: “Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?”

The Young Man answered, “I cleaned my mother’s hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes.”

The Director asked, “Please tell me your feelings.”

The Young Man said,

Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not be the successful me today.

Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.

Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.

The director said, “This is what I am looking for to be my manager.”

I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of

others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company’s performance improved tremendously.

A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop “entitlement mentality” and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent’s efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?

You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.

You would have forwarded many mails to many and many of them would have back mailed you too … but try and forward this story to as many as possible …. this may change somebody’s fate…

April 25, 2012

16 habits of highly creative people

If they work for them, they can work for you too!

“There is no use trying,” said Alice. “One can’t believe impossible things.” “I daresay you haven’t had much practice,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” – Lewis Carroll

Many people believe that creativity is inborn and only a chosen few are creative. While it is true that creativity is inborn, it is not true that only a chosen few are creative.

Everyone is born creative. In the process of growing up, educating yourself and adapting yourself to your environment, you slowly add blocks to your creativity and forget that you had it in the first place.

The difference between a creative person and a person who is not so creative is not in the creativity that they were born with but in the creativity that they have lost.

How can you enhance your creative ability? One possible way is to observe the habits of creative people, identify the ones that you feel will work for you and then make a plan to cultivate them.

Here are 16 habits of creative people. If you cultivate some of them, you will feel an increase in your level of creativity. In the process, you will also feel tickled by life!

1. Creative people are full of curiosity.

Creative people are wonderstruck. They are tickled by the newness of every moment. They have lots of questions. They keep asking what, why, when, where and how.

A questioning mind is an open mind. It is not a knowing mind. Only an open mind can be creative. A knowing mind can never be creative.

A questioning stance sensitizes the mind in a very special way and it is able to sense what would have been missed otherwise.

2. Creative people are problem-friendly.

When there is a problem, some people can be seen wringing up their hands. Their first reaction is to look for someone to blame. Being faced with a problem becomes a problem. Such people can be called problem-averse.

Creative people, on the other hand, are problem-friendly. They just roll up their sleeves when faced with a problem. They see problems as opportunities to improve the quality of life. Being faced with a problem is never a problem.

You get dirty and take a bath every day. You get tired and relax every day. Similarly, you have problems that need to be solved every day. Life is a fascinating rhythm of problems and solutions.

To be problem-averse is to be life-averse. To be problem-friendly is to be life-friendly. Problems come into your life to convey some message. If you run away from them, you miss the message.

3. Creative people value their ideas.

Creative people realize the value of an idea. They do not take any chance with something so important. They carry a small notepad to note down ideas whenever they occur. (I usually type it in my mobile/laptop whichever available.)

Many times, just because they have a notepad and are looking for ideas to jot down, they can spot ideas which they would have otherwise missed.

4. Creative people embrace challenges.

Creative people thrive on challenges. They have a gleam in their eyes as soon as they sniff one. Challenges bring the best out of them – reason enough to welcome them.

5. Creative people are full of enthusiasm.

Creative people are enthusiastic about their goals. This enthusiasm works as fuel for their journey, propelling them to their goals.

6. Creative people are persistent.

Creative people know it well that people may initially respond to their new ideas like the immune system responds to a virus. They’ll try to reject the idea in a number of ways.

Creative people are not surprised or frustrated because of this. Nor do they take it personally. They understand it takes time for a new idea to be accepted. In fact, the more creative the idea, the longer it takes for it to be appreciated.

7. Creative people are perennially dissatisfied.

Creative people are acutely aware of their dissatisfactions and unfulfilled desires. However, this awareness does not frustrate them. As a matter of fact, they use this awareness as a stimulus to realize their dreams.

8. Creative people are optimists.

Creative people generally have a deeply held belief that most, if not all, problems can be solved. No challenge is too big to be overcome.

This doesn’t mean they are always happy and never depressed. They do have their bad moments but they don’t generally get stumped by a challenge.

9. Creative people make positive Judgment.

A new idea is delicate. It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn. It can be stabbed to death by a quip and worried to death by a right man’s brow – a businessman Charles Brower

The ability to hold off on judging or critiquing an idea is important in the process of creativity. Often great ideas start as crazy ones – if critique is applied too early the idea will be killed and never developed into something useful and useable.

This doesn’t mean there is no room for critique or judgment in the creative process but there is a time and place for it and creative people recognize that.

10. Creative people go for the big kill.

Creative people realize that the first idea is just the starting point. It is in the process of fleshing it out that some magical cross-connections happen and the original ‘normal’ idea turns into a killer idea.

11. Creative people are prepared to stick it out.

Creative people who actually see their ideas come to fruition have the ability to stick with their ideas and see them through – even when the going gets tough. This is what sets them apart from others. Stick-ability is the key.

12. Creative people do not fall in love with an idea.

Creative people recognize how dangerous it is to fall in love with an idea. Falling in love with an idea means stopping more ideas from coming to their mind. They love the process of coming up with ideas, not necessarily the idea.

13. Creative people recognize the environment in which they are most creative.

Creative people do most of their thinking in an environment which is most conducive to their creativity. If they are unable to influence their physical environment, they recreate their ‘favourite’ creative environment in their minds.

14. Creative people are good at reframing any situation.

Reframes are a different way of looking at things. Being able to reframe experiences and situations is a very powerful skill.

Reframing allows you to look at a situation from a different angle. It is like another camera angle in a football match. And a different view has the power to change your entire perception of the situation.

Reframing can breathe new life into dead situations. It can motivate demoralized teams. It helps you to spot opportunities that you would have otherwise missed.

15. Creative people are friends with the unexpected.

Creative people have the knack of expecting the unexpected and finding connections between unrelated things. It is this special quality of mind that evokes serendipitous events in their lives.

Having honed the art of making happy discoveries, they are able to evoke serendipity more often than others.

16. Creative people are not afraid of failures.

Creative people realize that the energy that creates great ideas also creates errors. They know that failure is not really the opposite of success.

In fact, both failure and success are on the same side of the spectrum because both are the result of an attempt made. Creative people look at failure as a stopover on way to success, just a step away from it

April 25, 2012June 9, 2017

10 Tips to Simplify Your Life and Improve your Happiness Index

Over the last decade or so life has consistently been enriched because of more and more facilities, on-going gadgets inventions and day by day increment in luxuries. This is quite exciting however during the same period of time, people have increased their love for materialistic things abruptly which has directly or indirectly reduced their overall happiness index. Now a days, we have more luxuries but less delights and high stress levels. We have more sugar, blood and heart patients then it used to be a decade back. The reason for all the stress and anxiety is simple that we are not living a simple life.

Below are some tips which can simplify your life and may amplify the happiness scale of your life.

1-    Avoid getting influenced: You don’t have to follow every single trend in society. If your friend has purchased a new BMW, you don’t need to buy a Mercedes to impress. Live for yourself not for others. If you purchase a high-end luxury car today, your love for this will end soon and you will be selling it at considerable financial loss though I am not forbidding to purchase luxury things once in a considerable duration of time.
2-   Avoid impulse buying: You don’t need to buy every single gadget instantly which you like in this shop. Do your Needs Vs Wants analysis. Buy only if it is really increasing your peace of mind. Remember that now a days the standard life of every gadget (phone, tablet, laptop, jewelry etc) is more or less 6 months because of new and new products release by several companies.
3-   The 6 months Rule: Generally speaking, anything which has not been used in last 6 months will not be used in next 6 months most likely. Give such things (shoes, garments, toys, mobiles, house hold items) in charity. This will help spreading happiness in society and reducing your space at home.
4-   Avoid Credit Cards Usage: Avoid this as much as you can. Debt is a silent stress and eating up your mental health slowly. Your brain might get old while you are young at heart. You might develop high BP or sugar because of stress due to credit. Live a credit-free life.
5-   Learn to say No: Don’t accept every single attractive offer from the bank representative or a car loan company. Do your “Needs Vs Wants” analysis. Careful spending is always recommended.
6-   Reduce too much social gatherings: Stay at home. Spend quality time with your spouse and kids for empowered relationships. You don’t have to say yes every time to your friend who is coming to pick you from home to join another late night social get together.
7-   Reduce your love for money: Careful spending and saving is important but don’t allow your brain to keep doing the calculations all day long. You love for money is pulling your brain strings and damaging your peace of mind silently. Stay away from too much thoughts about your financials.
8-   Less TV more Books: It is proven that people who watch more movies generate high level of stress. Read quality books to learn wisdom and attain high degree of happiness.
9-   Spend time with Nature: Instead of going to cinemas and malls repeatedly, spend time in parks. This will relax your brain, body and soul.
10- Change your eating habits: why eating lavish foods by visiting costly restaurants again and again in a week. The purpose of food is to fill your belly for some hours. So the suggestion here is to go for simpler and healthier food. Remember, most of the food items in the market are fried which are increasing your cholesterol level silently hence making you a heart patient in the long run!

Work on your real wealth and live a happy life J

Do you have any suggestions for simplifying the life. Do share with me at mjunaidtahir at gmail dot com

0038-mjunaidtahir-paradigmwisdom-18Apr12- 10 Tips to Simplify Your Life and Improve your Happiness Index

Frustration

There is nothing that makes you frustrated.

Any frustration you experience is the result of

your own choice to react with frustration.

There is nothing that makes you annoyed.

Any annoyance you experience comes about because

you have decided to be annoyed.

You can choose to be annoyed,

frustrated, angry, and spiteful.

You can also choose not to be.

Imagine how effective you could be if there was nothing that annoyed you.

That level of effectiveness is yours to choose, right here, right now.

All sorts of things will happen in your world today.

You can let them get to you, and annoy and frustrate you,

or you can choose to follow your own path.

You have the power to be free of frustration, free of annoyance,

free to accomplish and enjoy life. Choose that freedom today.

~Ralph Marston~

Some Quotes from my self-improvement diary

1. Failing to plan is planning to fail.

2. Winners don’t do different things, they do things differently.

3. Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is better to bend a little than to break.

4. Time management is life management so guard your time with great care

5. You must discover that which makes us unique.

6. We must become the change we want to see. –Mahatma Gandhi

7. If you do everything with the feeling of happiness, there will be no task too difficult to perform.”

8. Know more than other, work more than others, expect less than others. (Three keys to success)

9. Don’t compare yourself with someone else, if you do so, you are insulting yourself.

Tips for Self-development

1. Start now Do something about your self-development today. Tomorrow, you can build on that.

2. Write down what you want to achieve Keep it brief – perhaps three outcomes. Monitor what happens. Don’t feel bad if you modify your plan – life is about change. Whether you succeed or not, learn from the experience.

3. Learn from other people Notice what other people do and learn from them. You can gain from their successes and their mistakes. Experience is a harsh teacher, but less so if it’s someone else’s experience

4. Embrace change If people and ideas didn’t change, we’d still be in the Stone Age.

Story: The Pond of Milk

Once there was a king who told some of his workers to dig a pond. Once the pond was dug, the king made an announcement to his people saying that one person from each household has to bring a glass of milk during the night and pour it into the pond. So, the pond should be full of milk by the morning. 2- Be honest in your actions regardles of thinking about others. Your honesty is related to your character.

After receiving the order, everyone went home. One man prepared to take the milk during the night. He thought that since everyone will bring milk, he could just hide a glass of water and pour inside the pond. Because it will be dark at night, no one will notice. So he quickly went and poured the water in the pond and came back.

In the morning, the king came to visit the pond and to his surprise the pond was only filled with water! What has happened is that everyone was thinking like the other man that “I don’t have to put the milk, someone else will do it.”
The article can have so many differnet conclusions, here are a couple of them:

1- when it comes to help poor people, do not think that others will take care of it. Rather, it starts from you, if you don’t do it, no one else will do it.So, change yourself to the way of God to serve Him and that will make the difference.

You Are The Results Of Yourself – Powerful words

….Pablo Neruda

Don’t blame anyone, never complain of anyone or anything
Because basically you have made of your life what you wanted.
Accept the difficulties of edifying yourself
And the worth of starting to correct your character.
The triumph of the true man arises from the ashes of his mistakes.
Never complain of your loneliness or your luck.
Face it with courage and accept it.
Somehow, they are the result of your acts and
It shows that you’ll always win.
Don’t feel frustrated of your own failures, neither unload them to someone else.

Sign up for a regular English tip on several websites.
Read a book you’ve already read
Read a book with lots of dialogue.
Read English language magazines.
Take a one week intensive course.
Teach your children or friends some English.
Say or think what you are doing in English as you do your daily tasks.
Watch English language news.
Watching English children’s TV programmes.
Read English children’s books.
Make your own vocabulary and read it several times daily

Drop all negative references of your past

One of the most severely limiting beliefs that many of us have is that the person we were yesterday is the person we have to be today.

If you can see how ridiculous and self-defeating this belief is, you can make an instant shift toward success. What prevents us from tapping into this potential is our own mental ties to the past.

Letting go of your past is like taking a set of heavy chains from around your neck.

Be Willing to Learn

Many of us are reluctant to learn from the people closest to us—our authorities, colleagues, staff and friends. Rather than being open to learning, we close ourselves off out of embarrassment, fear, stubbornness, or pride. It’s almost as if we say to ourselves, “I have already learned all that I can [or want to learn] from this person; there is nothing else I can [or need to] learn.”It’s sad, because often the people closest to us know us the best. They are sometimes able to see ways in which we are acting in a self-defeating manner and can offer very simple solutions. If we are too proud or stubborn to learn, we lose out on some wonderful, simple ways to improve our lives.

Remain open to the suggestions of . Ask senior devotees and authorities, “What are some of my blind spots?” By this simple process you end up getting some good advice. It’s such a simple shortcut for growth, yet almost no one uses it. All it takes is a little courage and humility, and the ability to let go of your ego. This is especially true if you are in the habit of ignoring suggestions, taking them as criticism.

Pick something that you feel the person whom you are asking is qualified to answer. Sometimes the advice we get usually prevents us from having to learn something the hard way

Some quotes from my personal diary

1- No one can ruin your day without your permission

2- Most of the people will be about as happy as they decide to be.

3- Other can stop you temporarily but YOU can do it permanently.

4- Success stops when you do

5- You will never have it all together

6- Life is journey not a destination. Enjoy the trip

7- The best way to escape your problem is to solve it

8- If you don’t start, it is certain you won’t reach.

9- He or She whoever laughs , lasts.

10- Life is what is coming, not what was.

11- Success is getting up one more time

12- When things go wrong, don’t go with them.

13- Never play with the feelings of someone. You may win the game but surely will lose the person for lifetime.

14- Defeating someone is easy as compared to winning someone.

15- The weak cannot forgive because forgiving is the attribute of strong.

7 Things You Should Add to Your Stop Doing List…Right Now!

You probably make lists of things to do and follow them through. But what about the things you should stop doing? Successful people do not do the following things but chances are you still do. Make a decision to add these to your “stop doing list” these from today going forward:

1. Making Excuses. Successful people do not blame others or make excuses or complain about their bad luck. They take full responsibility for their lives. They know that success and failure lie in their hands. So stop being a victim, stop whining and stop making excuses.

2. Drifting. Winners have a plan. They have a direction and a purpose. They do not

How to Develop Interpersonal Communication Skills

By: Joshua Uebergang

Often, problems arise when this coordination is co-opted by one party’s ignorance or incompetence at a given element. But do not fear. Here are nine quick tips to improving your interpersonal communications skills that will get you in the game right away.

#1 – ALWAYS ADDRESS PEOPLE BY NAME
This is the quickest, clearest skill to develop to let your conversation partner know you regard them as more than a sounding board. Something as simple as using their name will allow a much greater path toward mutual communication.

While we are busy in enjoying our lives with our families and friends, it’s almost mandatory to consider our role for the improvement of our environment, our surroundings and less fortunate community members. In my personal opinion, it’s not something which should be requested by the government, instead it’s a prime duty of every responsible citizen. In fact, this is the ‘virtual’ tax which every citizen should pay back to the society for the services which he/she enjoys in routine life. This article is sort of a self-audit guide which covers some of the critical aspects of social responsibilities on the basis of which you can analyze yourself on whether you are a responsible community member:

1. Do I observe people around me who need financial needs? Do I assist them in their crisis?

2. Do I visit any orphan, old age houses or any hospitals once in a month to help the needful people?

3. Do I take care of environment by using recyclable things?

4. Do I encourage others (including my children) to throw garbage only in the dedicated bins?

5. Whatever skills I have (doctor, engineer, lawyer etc), Do I do any free of cost service to the needful society members every month? Article written by Junaid.Tahir

6. Do I contribute in charity projects on monthly basis?

7. Have I ever donated blood?

8. Do I stop the evil and contribute to the good? (Stopping sometimes does not mean stopping by hand, it means involving the relevant Law and Order authorities to address the issue)

If answer to any or some of these questions is NO, then it’s time to start performing your civic responsibilities starting today. The first thing you can do right now is to share this article to others and generate a ripple effect.

Remember, if everyone of us start playing his/her role, we can bring peace, happiness and prosperity on earth !

0033-mjunaidtahir-paradigmwisdom-02Apr12- Are You a Responsible Citizen?

The world’s most innovative companies

http://www.forbes.com/special-features/innovative-companies-list.html

Rank	Company	Innovation Premium*
1	Salesforce.com	75.1
2	Amazon.com	58.9
3	Intuitive Surgical	57.6
4	Tencent Holdings	52.3
5	Apple	48.2
6	Hindustan Unilever	47.7
7	Google	44.9
8	Natura Cosméticos	44.5
9	Bharat Heavy Electricals	43.6

Are you one of those who receive hundreds of emails daily and having trouble to manage? Here are some recommendations which should help:

1- Guide your teams/colleagues on where to include you in cc and where not to. This will reduce email flooding. For example, if you are a manager, you are not supposed to be copied in all minor correspondences.

2- Develop the habit of fast reading.

The only foolish question is the one that was never asked!

When you begin any project, are trying to make a change in your life, or are faced with a difficult undertaking, the best way to improve your result is to ask the important questions first. If you are working as part of a team, some questions may need to be asked of others. When working towards an individual goal, you will be the one giving the answers.

Ask, ask, ask — until you’re confident that you have a firm understanding. Don’t wait until you’re stuck and spinning your wheels. Ask the questions and find the answers first!

Work, Family, Health, Friends & Spirit – An analogy

“Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air.
Name them -Work, Family, Health, Friends & Spirit.
You Are keeping all of them in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls –
Family, Health, Friends and Spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these,
they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for it.”

Islamic Wisdom: Do I really know what is Halal and what is Haram?

I have observed that the concept of Halal and Haram in these days has been limited to eating & drinking habits only . If a person is staying away from Wine and pork, he/she thinks that he is living a Halal life. Indeed this is an indication of very limited understanding of the concept of Halaal Haraam. Specially, considering the fact that Islam is a complete way of living and it has defined Halal (allowed/permissible) and Haram (Forbidden) things for every chapter of life, still Muslims take least interest in learning about it in detail. So I insist that it is the need of the hour that we understand the concept in detail and start living an all-positive life. After reading this article, Insha’Allah you will be convinced that

How To Accept Yourself

Every person you meet has something special to give you—that is, if you are open to receiving it.
Each encounter offers you the gift of greater self-awareness by illustrating what you do and don’t accept about yourself. An honest look will show you that the reactions you have to others give you more information about yourself than about them.

by Jarl Forsman:

“If we learn to open our hearts, anyone can be our teacher.” ~Pema Chodron

Reducing the Gap between Potential and Performance

First of all let us understand what is Potential and what is Performance. Potential is the ability to execute or accomplish something whereas Performance is the actual work done during specific timelines. This actual amount of this work would either be equal or less than the Potential. For example, a mason has the capability (potential) of laying 1000 bricks a day, however he lays 800 bricks (Potential). In this example, there is a gap of 200 brick which should have been laid by the mason in the ideal scenario.

So let us review some factors which

April 25, 2012June 9, 2017

10 Tips to Simplify Your Life and Improve your Happiness Index

Below are some tips which can simplify your life and may amplify the happiness scale of your life.

Work on your real wealth and live a happy lif

April 25, 2012

Criticism – The creativity Killer?

Ideally speaking, Criticism is the act of analyzing someone or something (such as an article, video, book, product service etc) with the intention of improving personnel, product or services. However in the day to day life, you will meet so many people criticizing with the negative intentions. For example they do this to defame, discourage and de-motivate others. So it is usually used in negative sense although criticizing does not necessarily means to find fault. In this article I shall give my comments in two categories. First, when you are being criticized and second when you are criticizing:

1- When you are being criticized:

a) Take it positive. There is a chance that your well wisher has rightly drawn your attention to something for which there is a dire need for improvement. If this is the case, be grateful to the person who helped you identified the aspect of improvement and move towards the corrective actions.

b) There is a chance that the criticism is being done just to depress you. Analyze is carefully. If required, seek advice from some friend or colleague about this negative feedback. If feedback meant to be good, see point-1 else shun it right way not allowing you to disturb your peace of mind.

2- When you are criticizing someone/something:

a) Always remember that negative criticism results in generation of negative energies so try to criticize in a positive and encouraging manager. Do not become the ‘full-stop’ for someone’s creativity.

b) Whenever you are about to criticize; ask yourself whether your intention is to help assist the person or you are just going to spread negativity which will consequently result in corrosion on someone’s creative skills.

c) If you really want to criticize someone, do it in an encouraging way. Try to give your comments in multiple groups so that the person understands your feedback and segregate it easily so that he can transform your suggestions in to corrective actions.

d) Remember the fact that the act of complaining is taking criticism to the next level which is even more damaging and dangerous. So try to remain inside the limits of criticism instead of complaints.

Having said that, there are bad mouthed people who are in habit of constant criticism, regardless of their mental comprehension of things. Be aware of them. They are polluting not only themselves but the environment as well and ultimately impacting you, your product, your skills and/or your services. They are spreading negativity.

Closing my article with the famous quote that says “Instead of criticizing others, become the change you wish to see in the world”

April 25, 2012June 9, 2017

Do You Judge People Fairly?

Once upon a time, three blind kids who have never heard of an elephant, were taken near to the elephant. First kid who touched the elephant from the tail commented that elephant is hairy and thin. Second kid who touched the elephant from legs concluded that elephant is very fat and unmovable thing. Third kid who touched the elephant from the trunk said that elephant is a curvy moving object. Do you think any of the kid said the right thing? Do you think that instant comments by any kid was a right approach? Do you think you behave just like blind kids, that is, giving instantaneous conclusive comments about people instead of judging them properly. In fact, sometimes you behave worst than that. You associate things with people which are never supposed to be concluded in that way. Sometimes you do character assassination of people and put their respect on stake. Isn’t it unfair? So how to judge people? Here are some points to be considered:

1- Be positive. Even if you notice any negative thing about someone. Don’t conclude about it. There is a chance your brain is thinking against the reality. Don’t let your brain cook bad curry. Explore the negative observation extensively but avoid spying on someone. Be straight and be upfront.

2- Physical appearance is not everything. Don’t judge people by their looks. A person in normal clothes and in a normal vehicle might be better than a person in brand new Mercedes or BMW. On the contrary, a rich man can also be equally a great person.

3- When judging people look for the Ethical richness such as honesty, truthfulness, simplicity, behavior, friendliness, down-to-earth attitude etc. Article written by Junaid.Tahir

4- A fly will always sit on the dirty and rotten part of the tomato. Never do this in your life. Every person has good and bad habits. Look at the positive side of things. If you feel something wrong, talk about it but don’t spread negative info about someone. Hate the bad habit, not the person.

Judging a person does not define who they are… it defines who you are !!!

So what are your suggestions on how to judge people?

Article Reference: 0019-mjunaidtahir-paradigmwisdom-11Mar12- Do you judge people fairly?

April 25, 2012

9 Ways to make Decisions

Its true that you are the product of your own thoughts and decisions. Whatever you decide on daily basis, whatever you do in your routine life is directly or indirectly linked to your future. That means you are making the foundation of your destiny with your decision and actions in your routine life. So by looking at the bigger picture, it is right to conclude that decision making is critically important for your success and achievements of lifetime goals. Given below is the list of insightful factors which you need to considere while making decisions.

1.     Consider the short term and long term consequences: Whether the decision is materialistic or a sensitive family matter. You have to consider short terms and long terms benefits.
2.    Cost Vs quality if applicable. If you intend to purchase something, consider cost, quality, warranty perspectives. Usually cheep products have less life and bad quality but is not the case always. To cope up with this, define your budget and then carefully analyze all the options which are falling within your budget.
3.    Need Vs wants analysis: Are you purchasing for pleasure or it is your long term need. Remember this is a difference between pleasure and happiness. Sometimes pleasure dost not last long so you don’t want to spend a lot for the sake of short time pleasure. If you are in Need of something then consider point-1 and point-2.
4.    Consider emotions: This is quite sensitive aspect. You have to put yourself in everyone’s shoes to understand his/her emotions. You don’t want to hurt someone with your decision, instead you want to keep your stake holders emotionally satisfied. Emotional Intelligence is an art; learn it by reading on internet. To understand people you have to have true sense of judging people
5.    Consider Win-Win: A balanced approach in which everyone gains is always recommended.
6.    Consider all options: Don’t stop your brain on one idea or approach. Think about more options. Seek advice from others on different possible solutions of the given situation/problem. to the problems which need decisions.
7.    Ask for criticism: If possible ask for criticism before implementing the decision. Although it’s never too late to ask for criticism even after your decision. Feedback always helps in your future.
8.    Learn to differentiate between Urgent and Important tasks. Read my article Urgent and Important.
9.    Closely observe others: Think about what your friend/colleague/acquaintance did under a specific condition. A wise man always learns from the mistakes of others.

Good decisions require good analytical skills. Read some tips here to improve your analytical skills.

0034-mjunaidtahir-paradigmwisdom-08Apr12- 9 Tips To Make Better Decisions

April 24, 2012

Rules for Small Business

Target

You are not all things to all people. Decide on your niche–narrow your focus and broaden your appeal.

Be Different

If your competitors are doing it, don’t. Stand out from an overcrowded marketplace where so much of the advertising and products look the same.

Build a Team

Don’t hire an employee to fill a position. Employ a person to be part of a team to build your business.

Be Fast

Time is the most precious commodity. When delivery is expected Friday, show up Thursday afternoon. Return calls and emails now.

Say Thank You

A lot. Tell your customers and employees how much you appreciate them. Better yet, do it the old fashioned way: take pen to paper and write them a note.

Be Consistent

Make sure your business has a consistent look and feel. A customer must get the same flavor from everyone within your organization. Always.

Smile

Throw out the reasons you think people buy from you like price, product quality or your warranty. They buy because they like you.

Fanatical Optimism

The glass must always be half full. Attitude will always win out in the end and infect all of those around you.

Sell Soft

Don’t ever hard sell. Solve problems. Satisfy wants. Do what is truly best for your customer.

Leave Your Comfort Zone

Never accept the idea that this is the way you’ve always done it. Never accept that a new idea or technology could never work for you.